Mar 26 2012

Parent Advice: If Your Child Is Being Bullied

Published by at 7:09 PM under Bullying Prevention

Here’s the problem with asking a school administrator to “fix” the bullying problem. They will sometimes call all the kids in together and try to “resolve the conflict.” It doesn’t work. The victim feels intimidated, outnumbered and/or embarrassed. They shut down, while the aggressor(s) spins a tale of “he started it, it’s her fault because…”, or makes excuses for their behavior. Since they are more outspoken, the admin. sides with them. Victim feels shamed, confused. Then later on, aggressor ups the bullying, because they know they can. What to do then? Bullying isn’t about conflict or two kids with different opinions. It’s about intimidation, harrassment, and power. Of course get the school involved. But insist that they don’t bring the kids in together. Get both kids to tell what’s going on, separately. If you know the other parent, contact them… not to get into an argument, but to appeal to them as a fellow parent. “I could use your help on this, my child is feeling…, I’m sure you can understand being a parent, too.” If that doesn’t work, then start insisting on changes at the campus environment. Schools want to help, but sometimes, they just don’t know the right way to approach this. And sometimes a parent is better equipped to help do the right thing.


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